In our last post (click here for Part 1) we explored what we mean by Self Esteem, and the benefits of developing our sense of self.

As we said, a strong self esteem will leave you with a robust sense of self. This allows you to feel more calm and secure when facing your everyday life.

Difference between Self Esteem and Self Confidence

It’s also important to remember the difference between Self Esteem and Self Confidence. Self Esteem is what we are, whereas Self Confidence is what we do. Another distinction is that Self Esteem is a given and remains through out our lives. Self Confidence, though, changes all the time, and usually increases as we grow up, until it starts decreasing again in our old age.

How to Develop Self Esteem*

If you’d like to improve your self confidence, all you need to do is practice that activity you want more confidence in.   The more you do, the more confident you will become at doing it.

With how to build Self Esteem, it’s more about a decision, understanding and frame of mind.

  1. Decide to make your sense of self-esteem unconditional.
  2. Learn to accept yourself- accept that this is who you are right now. Accept the colour of your eyes, your hair, etc. and then move to accepting your attributes etc. Accept yourself.
  3. Now ask “What can I appreciate about myself?” Appreciate your strengths. Appreciate what you are capable of. Appreciate who you are.
  4. What can you now highly esteem about yourself? Just like you might find a beautiful sunset awesome – as something you hold in high regard – what can you highly regard within yourself? Feel that same feeling of awesomeness for yourself, for your uniqueness. Learn to esteem yourself.
  5. Imagine moving through life with the weeks and months to come with this frame of mind… about yourself… Notice how it would transform things for you. Do you like this? Will you remember this?
    (*Based on the Neuro-Semantic Pattern “Accept, Appreciate, Awe”)


The more times you can repeat these five steps, the stronger your esteem will become.